What's Worth It? Week 6: Responsibility

Choices are the acid test of values. If we say that we value something, but make choices that detract from that value, then – chances are – we don’t really value that something as much as we thought.

For example, if I say I value physical fitness, but don’t make the time to exercise, then I probably don’t truly understand my own priorities. What I really value in that situation is either getting more sleep or playing video games or working on some other priority. It could be anything, but it’s not physical fitness.

This is a situation where my actions do not match up with my values. It’s not unheard-of (Paul talked about his experience in Romans 7:14-25), but when we allow ourselves to stay in that place, we are not being authentic. In harsher terms, we are the hypocrites that the non-religious community accuses us of being.

1 Timothy 4:16 warns against this. Paul wrote “Watch your life and doctrine closely,” knowing that even in himself it is all too easy to have a mismatch.

James 2:14-17 mirrors this idea. We can’t really say we have faith unless we have the actions that back it up. A “faithful” person who doesn’t help someone in need beyond mere platitudes can’t really say they care. Values:choices :: doctrine:life :: faith:actions. Values are to choices what doctrine is to life, and what faith is to actions.

(Click to enlarge. Original from 10/9/2005)

Sometimes, we think we have certain values, but end up adjusting our values when we face a challenge. This happens all the time. Something doesn’t match what we perceive, so we dismiss it, downplay it, or get angry. The above comic shows how it happens in the business world. And of course, politics is not exempt, as seen in this example from 2003: [Link]

This kind of thing is called “cognitive dissonance.” For a longer discussion about it, Dilbert artist Scott Adams provides this explanation. [How to spot cognitive dissonance.]

But for a quick illustration, there’s this:
(Click to enlarge, Original from 9/8/1999)

Cognitive dissonance can also happen when studying the Bible. It can work like this:

1. The Bible is true.
2. I think I’m a good person.
3. The Bible says I’m actually not a good person.
4. Therefore, the Bible is wrong, and I don’t want to study it any more.

When there’s a conflict in values, you have to make a choice. In Esther 4, Esther had to make a choice between her people and her position; she chose to risk her life for the chance to save her people, and she was fully reconciled to the fact she might die. In Daniel 3, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego had to make a choice between bowing to the king’s image of gold or dying in a blazing furnace; they chose the latter. And in Hebrews 11:35, we read of those who, though tortured, refused to be released.

In none of these examples was anyone at fault for the situations they found themselves in, yet they each took responsibility for what they could do. They didn’t run away from their problems. They didn’t pursue their own, pre-existing priorities. They didn’t give up on God. They set their values, made their choices, and were prepared to suffer the consequences.

Likewise, we don’t always control what happens to us. But we always control how we interpret what happens to us, as well as how we respond.

Focusing on fault locks us in a past tense discussion, but choosing to focus on what we can do in the present enables us to take responsibility for the moment. That’s where the real power is. It’s not so much that great power brings great responsibility – for us regular heroes, it’s that great responsibility brings great power.

I didn’t choose to get multiple sclerosis, and it wasn’t my fault. But other people with comparable health problems have helped me see the need to take responsibility for each moment I find myself in. Here’s a quote I’ve found inspiring, by a person who battles with obsessive-compulsive disorder:

“I didn’t choose this life; I didn’t choose this horrible, horrible condition. But I get to choose how to live with it; I have to choose how to live with it.”

If this seems daunting, don’t worry – we don’t have to be perfect at it right away. We can grow into it step by step. And that is the lesson for next week. 

Discussion questions:

1. What are some things you had to view differently about your own life when studying the Bible? How did your values change, and why?
2. In what ways do you need to watch your life and doctrine closely today?
3. What prevents us from being truthful and how can we help remove those barriers?